Better Than Sex - Dessert Restaurant (June 2021)

As part of my 50th Birthday Road Trip to the Florida Keys, we made reservations for the 1st night in Key West at Better Than Sex. There is no parking at the restaurant, so the daughter unit dropped me off out front and rode around to find a place to park. There is very limited parking in Key West and what is there you pay for and by pay, I mean like $10 for 2 hours type of pay and a 5–7-minute walk back to your destination. I most likely need knee surgery but I keep putting it off, so me and my cane were not hiking anywhere further than a minute or 2, lol. I digress. Better Than Sex – a big name to live up to. Too bad they really didn’t. I don’t know who they have had sex with, but I felt kinda bad for them. Not that the restaurant was bad, but it just was not, you know…better than sex. Not even better than that one time, oh - never mind, let me keep it PG. 

The ambience was great, and each table is set up in such a way with a half wall or curtain that makes it seem very private. Tables are for small parties; I want to say no more than 4 people and they will not push tables together. The tin tile ceilings, sexy boudoir framed photographs from local artists, dim candlelight, all set the tone and the mood. Cue Marvin Gaye’s Let’s Get it On playing in the background, not really but trying to get you in the right head space. The staff were very friendly and knowledgeable and made us feel welcome right off the bat. This is catered more towards couples, so it was a bit weird sitting at a table with my grown daughter while a rather large photo of a basically naked woman looming over us plus being surrounded by many other racy photos but ask me if that stopped me – nope. 

Shots, shots, shots, shots

 We got a round of shots and I will say this is where they had me thinking maybe there was something to the name. They make their own Amaretto, Irish Cream and Coffee Liquors (or Licker as they call it. Get it? Lick – er? (Snort laugh...yes, I sometimes act like I am 12). Product- of-my-loins got a Love Potion 69 (shot of Amaretto topped with whipped cream) and I got the Lucky Shot (Irish cream that I opted to top with their Lube – which is white chocolate mousse, instead of whipped cream). Holy all that's sexy, that Lube was fine and perfect balance to the amazing Irish Cream.  Those shots set the night off oh, so right. You can also buy bottles of their house made Lickers and I almost bought a case on the spot. Who needs a man? Ok, I went too far there, but they were really, really, really good. 

French Kiss 

We also ordered a couple of French Kisses (Champagne in a caramel drizzled wine glass topped with bruleed sugar). These were $20 each and not worth it. Also, the whole you are supposed to lick the caramel off the side of the glass then take a sip thing was just skeevy 1) in a COVID world and 2) sitting across from my baby girl. Not to mention the champagne was just ehh. 

   

Naughty by Nature

 For our treats we decided on Naughty by Nature. Here is their description – "Pure and innocent is what she may seem on the outside but take one sultry swallow and your instincts will bring you to the naughty side. The allure of her voluptuous strawberry bosoms, ignite the passion fruit behind. Inserted ever so coyly are layers deep of vanilla bean cake with a tart temptress of lime zest". All of that to say basically a just so-so tasting Neapolitan type cake of passion fruit, strawberry and vanilla. I got the Italian Stallion which was their take on a Tiramisu Pie thing-a-ma-bob. Both desserts were fine. Therein lies the problem, if you name your place Better Than Sex, I’m gonna need the desserts to be orgasmic. 

Italian Stallion

Exhibitionist (left)
 Super Soaker (right)

The other star of the night was the Super Soaker cocktail (a chocolate cake martini – chocolate cake made from scratch soaked in vodka for days). It was so nice I had to have it twice. While I had my private moments with this drink, my daughter had the Exhibitionist (red blend wine aged in bourbon barrels in a caramel rimmed glass). Not so good. She did not learn her lesson from the whole slobber on the glass experience earlier in the evening– yeah she is slow on the uptake sometimes but I still love her no matter what anyone says about her.

Over all, I am glad we got to check it out as I have heard so much about it. The new one that was going to be near my city ended up a casualty of COVID, before it even opened its doors. Not sure I would go back, but it was worth the experience at least once.